When people seem to reject you

Rain-kissed geranium

I don’t know how to start this blog.  Which is unusual for me.  Usually, I just dive in without a second thought, letting the blog write itself. 

This afternoon I want to write a personal blog.  A filled-with-feeling blog.  A blog which doesn’t just skim the surface of our experiences.  You know how it is.

People say, “How are you doing?” and you answer “Fine!” with a little lilt in your voice when really you’re sad or confused or challenged or trying to figure things out.  Because, it seems, most of the times people don’t really want to hear about our sorrows and suffering because they just don’t want to go there. 

Rum Punch. Annual. Honest, that's the name. A gift from my friend, Jan.

If you asked me how I was doing yesterday, the only answer to surface might have been, “Not so good.”  “Sad.”  “Awful.”

Not a good Summer Solstice type cheeriness.  Outside it has been raining and raining and raining some more.  Inside me it has been raining and raining and raining some more.

Single Bleeding Heart

Why?  you ask.  There is a simple answer and a complicated answer.  The simple answer is that I attended a township meeting on Monday night and voted against the desires of almost all the local attendees.  I don’t want to go into the specifics behind this decision, but you know that I had consulted my deepest heart of hearts and voted in a conscientious way, even though that way wasn’t the will of the majority of the people. 

My vote was the tie-breaker which implemented the unpopular action.  I felt good about it, deep inside.  When you’ve consulted your deepest self, and know you’re acting with personal integrity, you feel good.  Even though you may be wrong in the long run.  Even though you can understand exactly why everyone else feels the way they do.  You act on your deepest understanding–and it feels right.

Tip o' the lupine, to you!

However, the next day (yesterday) I awoke feeling like someone punched me with a truckload of cement blocks.  Perhaps it was the energy of people not understanding.  Who knows? 

OK, here comes the complicated explanation.  I have been working through the book The Presence Process by Michael Brown for the past couple of months.  This book aims at getting us to feel our emotions unconditionally, without masking, sedating, or controlling them. 

As we work through the ten week exercises, we’re gently warned that things might get a little–how do we say it?–emotional.   We even welcome the emotions arising because they are often emotional charges which are rising to the surface to be integrated. 

I didn’t expect to find myself mired in such sadness and confusion and emotion yesterday.

Soft buttercup

But, through it, I discovered this deep-seated emotional challenge.  Ever since I was in seventh grade and my best friend fell in love with her future husband–and rejected me–or so it seemed–I have a pattern of feeling so hurt when other people seemingly reject or leave me, that I proceed to reject them in return.

You know.  If you don’t love me, then I don’t love you.

Not everybody.  But many times.

A vicious painful cycle of feeling rejected and withholding love because I feel so hurt.

Deepening fog

Today, feeling still rather tentative, I wandered by my blogging friend Marianne’s blog.  It’s called Miracle Mama and she calls it a collection of “miracle stories and magical moments”.  I read her story about Lester Levenson and his discovery of “love in its highest and purest form” and something clicked.

You know how it clicks inside of us?  Click.  And you get it.  Down to your tippy toes.

Dreams of fern

Lester suffered a severe coronary attack at age 42 and was given less than a couple of years to live…or he could be gone tomorrow.  He realized his problems were within, and he needed to figure out what is happiness.  He struggled to look deep within and eventually discovered that he was happy when he was loving.  (Read more of Marianne’s story to discover more–or especially click on his story at the end of her post.)

Looking up at leaves in fog

Upon reading Lester’s story, sitting awash in lingering emotions from childhood, I suddenly “got it”.  I could continue to choose to reject those who rejected me…or I could simply continue to love them, no matter whether they liked or approved of me or not. 

That simple.

It’s our CHOICE.

I delved back through imagination into several painful past rejections and truly, totally, released my suffering, my sadness, my regret, my shame that I couldn’t be who they wanted me to be.  

I would continue to love them anyway, as unconditionally as possible, whether they were present or absent.  Because that’s what I can do.  I can see people in light, in love, in beauty.  Who cares if they are in my life today?  Who cares what they think?

I can continue to love them. 

And that makes me happy. 

Thank you for listening.

About Kathy

I live in the middle of the woods in Michigan's Upper Peninsula. Next to Lake Superior's cold shores. I love to blog.
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66 Responses to When people seem to reject you

  1. Elisa's Spot says:

    Thanks for sharing this outloud.

    • Kathy says:

      Elisa, I figure as long as I’m trying to express myself with integrity this week–and have done so in such a public way–might as well continue to be courageous. thank you.

  2. Fountainpen says:

    Kathy….It is so difficult to stand in
    one’s own truth…..look at it this way…
    You were not sent to solitary confinement,
    whipped….sent out of your church….or beheaded……
    you were thought of critically….or scolded critically at the meeting
    or later……hey! Not bad for standing in your
    truth!!!!
    Stand strong, my sister, stand strong!!!!!
    Fountainpen!

    • Kathy says:

      What a good way to look at it, fountainpen. We are lucky we live in a place where we can speak our truth without fear of beheadings or stonings or dying on a cross. (Except maybe a cross of our own making.) I was scolded a couple of times though. But that was OK.

  3. Brenda Hardie says:

    Hi Kathy…hugs hugs and more hugs…I’m sorry you were feeling so blue yesterday! I am so glad you shared the reasons for your sadness. And I am even more glad you found some relief and direction and inspiration from the blog you mentioned. (I loved it as well!) Another thought has come to mind though…this “thing” you are doing…this “choosing” is so much like what I experienced in my therapy classes many years back…called “radical acceptance”…here is a definition I found on line from someone going through similar therapy…
    ————————–

    “I’m learning a new concept in my life. It’s called Radical Acceptance. It’s taken from DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy).

    Here’s a definition of it:

    RADICAL ACCEPTANCE

    So what’s Radical Acceptance? What do I mean by the word ‘radical’? Radical means complete and total. It’s when you accept something from the depths of your soul. When you accept it in your mind, in your heart, and even with your body. It’s total and complete.

    When you’ve radically accepted something, you’re not fighting it. It’s when you stop fighting reality. That’s what radical acceptance is. ”
    —————
    That pretty much describes it…and it took me a long time and much hard work to “get it”. Your discovery is the very same thing. Totally accepting something (even though it brings you discomfort) is radical acceptance. Learning to love in spite of this discomfort is radical acceptance! Most people learn this skill growing up…I did not, but was lucky enough…no, not lucky…blessed!, to be in a therapy group that taught me the things I missed growing up. And I cannot help but notice when people share their acceptance of things that bring pain and or heartache in their lives. It still amazes me how freeing this skill is!!!

    It’s been raining and raining and raining here too…there is standing water everywhere! Thank you for sharing your beautiful pictures again…they add brightness to the dreary day.

    • Kathy says:

      Brenda, I have read about Radical Acceptance before and have even attempted to practice it in different areas of my life. Some places it’s been amazingly successful; thus far I hadn’t penetrated deeply enough in this area. I am so proud of you and your learnings in this area! Way to go, girl!

      I do have a question about Radical Acceptance that keeps arising. Let’s say a person is addicted to drugs. (Not that I am.) Are they advised to radically accept their addiction? That part is always confusing to me. Thank you, Brenda.

      • Brenda Hardie says:

        I am familiar with this ambiguous area…but over a different problem (my ex has Parkinson’s Disease) and I was having tremendous difficulty dealing with it when he got so bad he was put on disability (this was while we were still married). During this time I was very sick mentally (long long story, not for here) and was in that therapy class I mentioned. One thing I had to work on was accepting the illness and the effects and losses caused by that illness. I fought and fought because I didn’t want to “accept” it!! My therapist taught me (over a long period of time…it was not something that happened overnight) that it wasn’t so much about accepting the illness as it was releasing control over the losses of the illness. There was nothing I could do about the illness so therefore there was nothing I could do to change the situation. I would only find relief by letting it go. It was a very hard thing to learn, but I did it! As far as a drug addiction (there were some women in my class dealing with that very same issue, either their own addictions or someone in their family) first and foremost was the issue of safety…then it was of course the admitting to the addiction, then it was the slow process of becoming clean and learning ways to stay that way. When it was in regard to a family member…it was pretty much the same process as what I dealt with. Adding in the safety issue though. A book I had to read during this time was “Ambiguous Loss” by Pauline Boss, it opened my eyes to many things regarding my situation. It may help you too. Each person in the therapy class had their own “issues” and while in class the concepts were taught in a general fashion and our individual sessions were where we talked about our personal issues so I wasn’t privy to the specifics of each person’s case. I would recommend learning more about the concept of radical acceptance and maybe reading the book I mentioned. It helped me in ways that still amaze me. Thank you for the positive words…it was long and difficult journey. I honestly didn’t think I would survive the struggle. But, here I am!!! Happier and healthier than ever before!

  4. Marianne says:

    You brought me to tears, Kathy. I’m so happy for you and I’m so happy that something I posted on my blog had such a deep impact on someone. Great going, girl! Share, share, share, you never know when someone could be helped by something you posted, that’s my motto.

    • Kathy says:

      Marianne, it did have a very deep impact on me. Thank you for being open to sharing this~~see how much our sharings can effect others. I want to digest Levenson’s teachings more slowly at a later date, preferably after completing the Presence Process. It sounds like Robin has gotten quite a bit out of the YouTube videos. Thank you again from the bottom of this shaky but soft heart.

  5. Colleen says:

    Kathy,
    I am in awe of your accomplishment. Knowing this to be a profound (and ultimately beautiful) journey……

    XXOO

    • Kathy says:

      Colleen, I will be in awe when–and if–I can LIVE this truth fully. Smile. In the meantime, it’s a start. And it’s already a soft light shining through this gray and rainy and tender week. Thank you.

  6. Love it and you for sharing…..I am listening and relate quite a bit, especially right now.

    • Kathy says:

      Kim, it’s good when we can share our stories of rejection or suffering~~it’s good to know we’re not alone and that we all feel like this at times. Blessings…

  7. Susan D says:

    Beautiful.

    • Kathy says:

      Susan, I know we’ve talked about this in person, so I won’t say too much more except Thank you. And looking forward to our lunch next week.

  8. holessence says:

    Kathy – What a beautiful shift in perspective (change of heart) you’ve described here. Namaste’

  9. Susan Derozier says:

    Kathy – Thank you for honoring us by trusting us with your naked truth. Again, you touched the deepest part of me that has been dealing with similar situations. Totally and unexpectedly, my longest closest friendships have unraveled over what would seem to be petty issues. Of course, we both know that the issues on the surface are not what is really happening. it would seem I have been “released” from the affections of others though my loving feelings continue towards them. I, too, have suffered a deep sadness at the lost of history and friendship. One has given no reason at all (and has also discontinued friendships with a number of others). Another resulted from a ranting political tirade which totally took me off guard. The third seemed to be projected onto me through anger with another person. My deepest knowing would tell me there is some lesson I have not completed which has brought this on. However, that hasn’t helped ease the pain of it. My personal philosophy has always been based on “God is love.” and that “God has created us in His own image.” Therefore, I AM love. Love isn’t something I feel or get or let go of. Love is what I am, like a house with many rooms (types of love). And so I ponder and grieve the thought of these losses while still respecting their choices. Sometimes the rain helps. When nature weeps it makes me feel less alone.

    I respect you for speaking out against all odds to stay in your truth. I’m grateful for your words and beautiful photographic art. In the end it would all seem to be about love, wouldn’t it? And only our inner truth keeps us clear on what that is or isn’t. Thank you for you!

    • Kathy says:

      Susan, thank you for sharing your own raw and intimate experiences with rejection. It hurts to think of anyone rejecting a person as loving as you. I am feeling what you said here: Therefore, I AM love. Love isn’t something I feel or get or let go of. Love is what I am, like a house with many rooms (types of love). That is really beautiful.

      One of the reasons I decided to write this is because I am sure all of us have experienced rejection at different times. Perhaps those of us who fiord our individual ways more than others might experience in more often–because others are often afraid or intimidated by behavior out of the “norm”. I don’t know. I just know that the way you stand in your truth is precious. Thank you.

  10. Nicole Smith says:

    Kathy, you’re so amazing!

    • Kathy says:

      Nicole, smiling–as I said up above in response to someone’s comment~~if I can LIVE this truth and realization, it will indeed be amazing. Thank you, fellow seeker of truth and integration.

  11. Dawn says:

    It’s so difficult to speak your truth against everyone else’s opinion! You are a strong woman to be able to do that, and I respect you for it. And such a lesson to recognize that you are free to love people regardless of whether or not they love you back. There is such freedom in that! Hugs…thanks for sharing!

    • Kathy says:

      Oh, it was so hard, Dawn. The easier thing would have been to agree with all the others. Peer pressure is such a strong force! It would have been easier to go with them…but then how do we live with ourselves? That’s who we go home to in the long run. Sigh…no easy answers.

  12. Sybil says:

    What a lovely forthright story. You have a deep understanding of yourself. Thank you for sharing with us. There is certainly a message here for me.

    BTW — when people ask me how I am. I respond “Relatively unscathed. Thank you for asking”. That always leaves them wondering.

    • Kathy says:

      I am glad to have written this, then, Sybil. I figured there would be a message for everone who has experienced rejection and still struggles to integrate it. I have been involved in this deep inner journey for a long time–since 1986–and maybe before. I like what you say about “relatively unscathed.” That is a line many of us should consider!

  13. Karma says:

    Kathy, once again, you have made me think about things in a way that I haven’t before. Rejection from those you thought cared does hurt in a deep way; I’ve wrestled with some similar feelings recently. Continuing to love when you feel the others do not seems like a challenge, but I think I can understand how it would be healthier both spiritually and physically not to spend the negative energy rejecting. I guess a question for me, and perhaps you too, would be, if the people in question are still a regular part of your life do you continue the relationship even if it is one-sided, in the process of continuing to love? Does one continue to try to please the person who doesn’t seem able to reciprocate? Questions with perhaps no answers.
    P.S. I love the buttercup shot. The cheerful little flower really jumps out at you.

    • Kathy says:

      Karen, you ask such a good question, and I think there is no easy answer. The only source that we can trust to know the right answer to that question is deep within ourself–and that changes for every person and situation. Sometimes it’s OK just to love at a distance, staying open to future possibilities. At other times, when the other’s energy feels toxic, it may be necessary to limit all contact (except sending love in our heart.) Still, at other times, our deepest inner answer might be to continue dancing alongside them, even if they don’t meet our expectations or respond in the way we desire.

      Like you say, it is so easy to waste energy on negativity. I’ve seen over and over again that the main person that ends up hurting is ourself. I wish you gentleness as you seek inside for the answers that are already there as you ask the question…

  14. john says:

    If more people supported what is right, rather than what is popular our country would be in a lot better shape than it is.

    You are an intelligent, thoughtful person with above average analytical skills. You made up your mind, you cast your vote. Your vote was very likely correct and unconditional love is right and true.

    • Kathy says:

      John, I struggle with what is “right”. You ask one person what is right, and they have a strong answer. Another person has the opposite strong answer. I guess our only choice–my only choice–is to consult my heart. It may not be the right answer, but it’s the only answer I can choose. There is also the question of whether we are reacting or responding. I have discovered that reacting hurts myself and others again and again. Responding is a choice that comes when we’re in our heart, our mind, and spirit. I long to continue to choose response over reaction more faithfully. It’s a journey we’re all in…

  15. Reggie says:

    Hugs, Kathy, and blessings on your journey. So awed and humbled by how openly and warmly you share such thoughts with us. Love the link to Miracle Mama’s post about Lester Levenson, will watch the video now.

    • Kathy says:

      Hi, Reggie. Thank you! It felt a little vulnerable to write this, but good. Kind of like the meeting, but not so challenging. I am glad you liked reading the link, too. Blessings to you…

  16. OM says:

    Oh, Kathy! So many folks have already said what I would say. I could add that in both situations, the voting and the realization that you have a choice to continue loving when rejected, it is Truth you are honoring. The Truth of exactly who you are, you the citizen, and you the friend, and you the Spirit. And the truth of your “shadow” feelings, which, when honored, have served their Purpose and can dissolve. Sounds as if they have, already!
    What you’ve discovered sounds similar to something I too discovered: that having a lit-up, glowing heart chakra feels so damned good to me, I don’t care in the least what some other person feels toward me!! I’m gonna keep that fire glowing, and aim it at everyone, blast them with that firehose coming out of my chest, haha.. And then relate to them on the practical level as my human self deems best!!
    Each of your pictures was stunning!! Thank you for the wonderment of Nature’s Art.
    Giving you a big hug of empathy and joy, and gratitude for writing something which creates shifts in every reader,
    OM

    • Kathy says:

      Grinning, OM. Picturing you with that fire engine hose coming out of your chest, sending the light and love of your open heart everywhere. Honoring Truth is not a small thing. When we can listen deeply and discern what our truth is. When we listen deeply, we’re more likely to be responsive and not reactive. It was also good to talk with one of the affected township board members for 25 minutes on Thursday. Even though we don’t agree, we can move toward understanding one another a little better.

  17. P.j. grath says:

    Kathy, this is SUCH an important realization and such a HUGE challenge! It’s still a struggle for me. That is, step forward, step back, over and over. But thank you so much for posting on this subject. Here’s an interesting coincidence: someone who usually posts about books rather than personal subjects wrote about rejection the other day, too: http://collectingchildrensbooks.blogspot.com/2011/06/rejections-and-acceptances.html
    I should go back to his blog and leave a link to yours!
    Thanks again.

    • Kathy says:

      Pamela, perhaps it’s our steps forward and backwards which create a groove that eventually helps us to 100% totally live it. I am hoping I can live this realization a little better into the world. Just hopped over to your friend’s blog and left a comment commiserating on his rejection. That’s one rejection I wouldn’t mind. 🙂

  18. You made the difficult, but wise decision in the end! I admire you for striving to keep the happiness in your life, despite a few curve balls! 😉

    • Kathy says:

      Holly, I think this is really one of the most important reason why we are alive. To life our truth–no matter how challenging and hard that may be. It’s amazing how many years it takes us to truly get it in some areas of our lives. I guess we’ll be learning until we take our last breath.

  19. Robin says:

    I added the book (The Presence Process) to my reading list after you mentioned it on your other blog. I planned to get it when I finish this outdoor commitment because I wasn’t sure adding something else right now would be a good idea. However, after reading this post, I am reconsidering (because I’m dealing with a rejection from a family member that is unexpected and hurtful). Reading your post (and enjoying your stunning photos), I feel as though I just learned something very important. I don’t know how to explain it so I’ll just say thank you. Thank you. 🙂

    • Kathy says:

      Gosh, Robin, I don’t know whether you should start the Presence Process on top of your current commitment~~it might be too much at the same time. When the author indicated that we would be bringing many supressed emotions to the surface, I wasn’t really expecting it with this much intensity. You might want to pick up the book, read it, and then wait until your commitment is over to really focus in on it. When I read it, my mind understood it. When undergoing the ten-week process, my emotions are getting it. And the difference is HUGE! Please let me know after you undergo the process, if you decide to do it. (And I’m delighted that you were so moved by Lester Levenson, too. Huge insights coming through.)

  20. Carol says:

    Because we moved around so much when I was growing up (sometimes 8 schools in a year), I grew up making friends and then leaving them; the end result now being that it’s sometimes too easy to turn my back and leave people emotionally when the going gets too tough. It’s hard to break the habit, but broken it must be. Thank you for reminding me that it’s my choice!

    • Kathy says:

      Carol, I can truly understand. How challenging for a small child to be moved so many times~~and how easy to begin to think you can just replace people as the going gets tough. I wish you much success as you decide to stay present when it gets hard. Part of it, for me, seems to involve being able to feel hurt and confusion and sadness without running away, trying to fix it, or telling a story about it.

  21. Martha Bergin says:

    Hi Kathy,
    What a beautiful blog! The pictures are, for me, even MORE exquisite than usual. Please bear with me here, I’m going to share with you a little of my own, personal truth, and it’s sorta about your blog, but of course also much more about me. I think you know how these things go. I clicked on your blog today and read it because the title indicated that it was about some personal struggle that you, or someone close to you, may be facing, or something on that order. That is something I can relate to, because most of my life is a learning curve. And in that regard, I’d like to share with you my unqualified support and admiration for your vote that followed your deepest conscience, and honored your deepest knowing. That action ROCKS! …I was ready to read about the struggles, but there are (many) times I don’t click on your blog and read it, because you’re out there having a real good time and taking these glorious pictures and communing with these cool, wonderful and loving friends… and I’m not. Where I live it’s 113 degrees, and I don’t get out of town, basically because I choose to stay here because there’s a lot of hard work here that must be done. And I know in my heart that I need to do it. Runs the gamut from painting my family room to spearheading an economic project that I think can make a positive contribution to the world on many levels, and all sorts of things in between. I’m even starting a new approach to higher education for women in (federal) prison, which is another separate project. And there are a couple of others. And I don’t take time to blog or take pictures, and there’s a part of me that is SO upset that I haven’t integrated those processes. And then there you are, taking gorgeous pictures of your outings (!) on the peninsula. Sometimes, you know, I feel like I’ll go nuts if I read your blog! But thank you for listening, ’cause of course writing this helped me work through a little tiny bit more of it.
    Martha

    • Kathy says:

      Martha, your comment meant so much to me. I listened really deeply to what you shared here and thought about it several times during the past couple of days. First, I admire what YOU are doing so much. Teaching, helping women in federal prison, spearheading an economic project!! Oh my goodness. There is part of me that would long to be making such a difference in the world. You are in the nitty gritty of it, living it, doing what part of me wants to do so much~~and yet this is not where Spirit has ever let me go. I have tried to do things like this, but there is no fire in my heart to sustain projects like this.

      You have no idea how challenging it has been to learn to love living in the woods. I hated it here in the beginnning. It has taken years and years–and still sometimes it arises–to figure out how to live in the relative emptiness of this world. It has sometimes been hell scratching to find peace inside when there was so much space and quiet all around.

      This blog has been, for me, an exercise in discovering the beauty because I’ve had to learn to see it. It’s been an exercise to show myself that this is a precious place. Oh, I could tell you stories of tears and growth and struggle and challenges, and maybe I should have told more here. OK, could type on forever, but it’s time to turn off the computer for tonight. I so appreciate you, Martha.

  22. lola says:

    Hi from Spain Kathy, thank you for share this experience. To remember that loving is happines is what i’m working too. I just have to say that it works. Beautiful pictures!!.

    • Kathy says:

      Lola, thank you for stopping by the blog and commenting. It warms my heart to know that you are working on this, too. Blessings in Spain…

  23. nancy says:

    Kathy , if friends can not disagree and still be friends then there was never a friendship

  24. georgia mom says:

    I THOUGHT OF YOU ALL DAY YESTERDAY, KATHY.. KNOWING YOU HAD A DIFFICULT DECISION TO MAKE, BUT ALSO KNOWING WHAT A LOVING, CARING AND INTELLIGENT PERSON OUR SON MARRIED HAS BEEN A GIFT TO OUR SMALL DRUE FAMILY. I HAVE ALWAYS SAID REJECTION IS HARDEST TO HANDLE FOR ME. DAD AND I STUMBLED ON IT IN OUR WORLD OF WORK, BUT STEPPING BACK AND DOING WHAT YOU DID TO CLIMB OUT OF YOUR FEELINGS IS EXTRAORDINARY. YOUR BLOG FRIENDS EXPRESSED IT BETTER THAN I CAN IN MY OLE AGE. LOVED YOU FROM THE FIRST DAY WE MET. OUR SON IS BLESSED TO HAVE SUCH A GOOD LIFE WITH YOU.AND KIAH AND CHRIS A GREAT MOM. OXOX GA MOM

    • Kathy says:

      Mom, I hope we thanked you enough for these beautiful words in our phone conversation last night! You are a wonderful mother-in-law, too. I will keep these words warm in my heart forever.

  25. Kathy says:

    Thanks for sharing. Ethical codes cannot be enforced. One of the codes I studied, “Don’t desire to be liked or admired.”. I was from an authoritarian school system growing up where teachers gave grades rather than show us how to learn, so I wanted to be liked or popular as that made up for how bossy school workers were. When there was that art of rejection or art of selection as I call it, I took it personal for lack of not knowing not to take things literally. When a friend pointed out “Don’t desire” it didn’t mean not to want to be liked and if rejected, reject back so to not have any scarcities or some crazy ‘think’ on my part back then. I had to inflow a lot of rejection before I woke up to not desire and could waste things when someone made me want to react negatively. I am having a tough time articulating this but hope you see the essence. That was cool to be true to your own view.

    • Kathy says:

      Kathy, thank you for sharing this. It IS hard to articulate this, but I think I understand what you are trying to share. I bow deeply to you for waking up to “not desire” and for standing in your own truth and beauty. Thank you for sharing your light and passion and love with the world.

  26. Peter says:

    Thanks for this blog entry! It contains a lesson well worthing learning but, alas, one I’ve needed to learn over and over again!

    Peter

    • Kathy says:

      Gosh, Peter, I’ve been learning it over and over and over again, too. I hope~~this time~~that something moves deeper. Nice to meet you. Glad we both blogged about rejection at the same time. 🙂

  27. Martha Bergin says:

    Hi Kathy, Thank you for your thoughts responding to my posting above. You DO have beautiful thoughts, and as you say, your mission is (among other things) to learn to appreciate the beauty where you are–which you are doing so whole-heartedly, and so deeply sharing it with us. Gee, you know, I don’t think God (Universal Consciousness) “sees” our missions as we do. Reading back over my posting, I think that it’s mostly whining –that is necessary for me at that moment in my journey, but whining all the same. We may think “her work is more fun and more beautiful,” or “her work is more socially involved, and may touch the lives of others more directly.” When I take a step back and think about these kinds of thoughts, I think that they probably have little meaning from a larger perspective. In a way it’s funny. We know we need to step out of our comfort zones in order to grow, and then when we do (at least I, myself for sure!) end up saying, “But it’s not comfortable here!” 🙂 Ah, life is bliss! I mean that with all of my heart, and I want to thank you, Kathy, for being one of the truly beautiful and inspirational people I’ve met over the last few years– either on, or off the internet! {{{{{HUGS}}}}} to you!, as we used to say on Zaadz/Gaia! Wishing you a blessed day, Martha

    • Kathy says:

      Smiling…yep, it sure can be uncomfortable outside our comfort zones, even when we seek to expand. Thank you so much for being YOU. Your comment moved me to tears. HUGS!!!!!

  28. Beautiful and touching personal post, Kathy. Thank you for sharing it with us. Did you feel better afterwards ? I happens with me when I write down my own worries, wounds, simply question myself “why”? Forgiving, showing compassion and love to the people whom we would not be ready to do so is probably one of the most powerful actions we as humans can do. You are who you are Kathy, a beautiful, honest and courageuse person. I admire you for this. Wish you all the best. I liked very much the comments you received, especially the one from “the other Kathy” 🙂

    • Kathy says:

      Yes, Isa, I felt better afterwards. It felt important to write this down. Not just for myself only, but for others who are going through similar situations. I agree with you about the power of forgiving, showing compassion and love. And hoping I have learned that on a deeper level this past week! Thank you for sharing your presence here.

  29. pearlz says:

    Such a deep post about the need to act with conviction and truth and know that means we cannot always be liked or understood. Were we put on this world only to be liked or to delve into deeper understandings.
    Thanks for sharing this.

    • Kathy says:

      Glad this resonated with you, June. I think we were put into the world to delve deeper. That is for certain. It is also interesting how many of us struggle in different areas to find unconditional love and acceptance. I think we must first find this within ourselves–and then it radiates into the world.

  30. Yes, I know that one –

Thank you for reading. May you be blessed in your life...may you find joy in the simple things...

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