Pssst, you can still say “terrorist” in a public blog, can’t you? Without the Homeland Security descending upon your little house in the woods? It still is a humourous country, isn’t it? Please tell me those federal agents can still crack a smile when they’re sipping coffee and monitoring our on-line activity.
Not that I would dare whisper that “t” word while maneuvering through airports. Oh, no, I wouldn’t dare mess with a TSA (Transportation Security Administration) official. I like that they’re trying to make our airports safe from crazy violence-prone folks. I like that they are trying to protect us from wild and raging fundamentalists who do stupid things like try to blow up airplanes and buildings and people.
Nonetheless, yesterday I was almost mistaken for a terrorist.
Sending Trenary Toast through the mail.
You’re on the edge of your seats now, aren’t you?
OK, here’s the story-behind-the-scenes.
One of my beloved readers, Fountainpen, requested some Trenary Toast. Her mouth desired a taste of this Upper Peninsula (Yooper) delight. (Not that I munch on this toast, mind you. But “real” locals do. I’ve brought a bag of Trenary Toast to my parent’s condo in Florida to delight an ex-Yooper. I think it reminds her of long-ago childhood in the Copper Country.)
Fountainpen offered to pay, but Fountainpen is always sending sweet gifts like homemade notecards, so I said, “Absolutely not!” Simultaneously, Linda, over at Collectionofthoughtswrittenonreaggedpiecesofpaper joked that she wanted some Trenary Toast, too, please.
She was shocked when I said sure. (Don’t you love to shock people?)
I scurried downtown, bought the infamous toast, found two dilapidated boxes for mailing, and engaged in a long conversation with another Linda at the Skanee Post Office concerning the exorbitant cost of mailing something as light as Trenary Toast.
Off went the packages. Didn’t think about them again. Hoped the recipients would enjoy munching.
Linda emailed this morning, just when I was certain there was Nothing Left to Blog About in the Entire World.
She had received the ragged package and…thinking she knew no one in L’Anse, Michigan…convinced herself that a terrorist had sent the mysterious box.
Please read her blog “Terrorist Trenary” if you want a good laugh.
Even though it is truly sad that we sometimes worry when opening unknown packages, fearful of white powder or bombs. We live in tentative times, bombarded by news of violence and despair daily. Who’s to say what’s coming in our mail, especially from an unknown sender?
Dear Federal Agents: Before you put Linda and me in jail for mentioning the “Terrorist” word in our blogs, please consider a little bribe.
Would you like some Trenary Toast with your coffee?
P.S. Dear Readers: When was the last time YOU were accused (even in someone’s vivid imagination) of being a terrorist?