From a sleepy caretaker, goodnight…

Dear Friends,

I am so tired.

You know the kind of tired that prevents you from forming complete sentenc.

The kind of tired

that makes you forget…

what was I going to say anyway?

tired.  tired.

when you shouldn’t be tired.

you are not the patient.

you are the care-giver.

and yet

you are

tired, tired.

here is a picture of our patient.  Knee replacement, left knee, yes:

Our Patient who is now at home and recovering wonderfully

I shouldn’t be tired, should I?

The patient should be tired, he should.

Yet he is perky and doing well

and I am–yawn–I am–

ok, never mind, here’s another picture:

What it looks like from the 8th floor of Marquette General Hospital

And here is another picture because

I am going to fall asleep

in the middle of the


on the day before


See Lake Superior? Yes? From the 8th Floor of Marquette General? Yesterday?

Yes, our patient is doing lovely. He is already planning on going back to work on Thursday, and he has dismissed the Home Health Care and he is toddling along on his walker with gusto and enthusiasm and he is doing his physical therapy exercises for his total knee replacement but I…

the helper…

am…yawn…um…ok….wishing you all a Happy Easter…but headed for a nap…g’night…

P.s  thank you for all your well-wishes and prayers and thoughts.  You guys are da best!  G’night…

About Kathy

I live in the middle of the woods in Michigan's Upper Peninsula. Next to Lake Superior's cold shores. I love to blog.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

79 Responses to From a sleepy caretaker, goodnight…

  1. Karma says:

    “Dr.” Karma prescribes wine and rest for the weary caretaker!

  2. susan says:

    After Easter, call for a massage. Great stress buster!
    Hugs to ya both

  3. Caretaking is hard work (but not a real word).

  4. 1. Soak in a hot tub
    2. With a good book
    3. A glass of your favorite wine
    4. And a piece of to-die-for chocolate
    5. Ahhhhhhhhhhh

  5. rehill56 says:

    so glad to hear! 😉 Hope you get a good long nap in!

  6. Hang in there, dear Kathy. The caretaker always tires first. Get some rest. Laurie’s advice about wine, book, and hot tub should be immediately heeded–that is if you can keep your eyes open to read and now drown.

  7. Sybil says:

    Yawn, Reading this post has made me sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepy.

    Shove over and don’t hog the whole bed …

    ‘night …

  8. bonnie says:

    The caring caretaker needs to be cared for too. So glad the patient is doing well. Even in the midst of your weariness, you still take great pictures. My best wishes to you both.

  9. Robin says:

    Caretaking is such loving work. It uses up so much energy that finishing sentences is not required. Finishing words is not required. Rest for the caretaker, however, is required. Rest, renew, refuel. Love replenishes. 🙂

    • Kathy says:

      It IS loving work, Robin. What a lovely way to put that! Yesterday, no matter how many catnaps I took, I couldn’t resurrect. But one always has to resurrect on Easter, don’t we? (And the book I am reading is called “Be Love Now.”)

      • Robin says:

        Oh! How is it? I have that on my reading list. I read “Be Here Now” last year, and am looking forward to reading more from Ram Dass. 🙂

        • Kathy says:

          I loved “Be Here Now”, but am not feeling as good about this book. It doesn’t feel like it’s written half as well. But the message is a good one–the remembrance to be in our hearts, to be the love that we are. (It was humbling this week to realize that when I get tired it feels so much more challenging to realize that love that we are…gosh darn it…)

  10. Heather says:

    Looks like a great place to recover! But I’m sure your couch or bed will do nicely for you, too. Happy Easter and Happy Convalescence – to both of you!

    • Kathy says:

      Happy Easter, Ms. Heather! (I hope nobody is convalescing at YOUR house.) I slept like a baby for 9 hours last night, and our patient slept equally well. We are doing good today, thank you.

  11. Dawn says:

    Glad to hear he’s doing good. Now you need to give a little care to yourself and let yourself sleep…sleep…sleep…he’ll be fine while you let go for a bit. Hugs to both of you.

    • Kathy says:

      Thank you, Ms. Dawn. It felt soooo good to sleep so long last night! And today we’re having turkey, one of the few days of the year that we eat meat. It’s a little itty bitty turkey that Barry got from his boss at Christmastime. Hope you have a wonderful Easter!

  12. Colleen says:

    I’m so glad you rested long and well! Happy Easter to both of you.

    • Kathy says:

      Hi, Colleen! Hope you had a wonderful Easter. We ate turkey. We so very rarely eat meat here at home. What did you eat?

      • Colleen says:

        Thank you Kathy, we did! We don’t eat a lot of meat either, very little for me, Rick a little more so but still not much, considering his Australian roots and heritage! We had our once a year ham…..uncured, unadulterated and slow cooked. And fresh local veggies and asparagus. Very simple.

  13. Christie Eagan says:

    Been kind of busy the last few days so I am just getting caught up on my internet news. Glad to hear caretaker and patient are doing much better. I am sure he will be relieved to have pain free knees once he looks back, after his recovery period. For now give him a pain pill and crack the whip as he works his way though the PT, he will be happy he did it in the end. As for you, pop the cork, put your feet up, and reward yourself for your hard work as well. The very best to both of you.

    • Kathy says:

      Christie, I am always happy to hear from you. I will tell him about your “crack the whip” comment, lol. He’s been doing his physical therapy really well–tomorrow he starts working with the actual therapist twice a week. Thank you for your well-wishes, my friend.

  14. jeffstroud says:

    Well, of course the care taker is tried. Emotional, physical, and spiritually tired!

    Rest, relax all is well, all is as it should be.

    Hopefully you followed Dr Laurie’s check list as well.

    Big ((Hugs)) to both of you!

  15. Fountainpen says:

    Great news!

  16. Susan D. says:

    Oh, you’re taking me back to the years of caretaking of Mama … oh, gosh, I didn’t mind, most of the time, really I didn’t. I was grateful that I was capable enough … I did grumble about doing her laundry, though. All the frustration was directed at a few dirty clothes and linens! Must have been symbolic somehow. i feel your weariness and cannot add to the wonderful comments of love and caring left here for you, my friend. You are wearing your CareTaking well, and you are loved. Thank you for squeezing us into your day/s …

    • Kathy says:

      I can’t imagine what it must feel like, Susan, to caretake someone like a Mama for years. I would imagine one would feel all sorts of emotions! Frustration and tender love and care, intermingled. I am not feeling weary any more, actually went back to work for a few hours this morning. Wanting to write something more today, but feeling like I have nothing to say….although that rarely proves the case, does it?

  17. forestfae says:

    I’m so glad your husband is feeling much better, can see it in his smiley faced photo.
    As for you, off to bed young lady. Have a good sleep and a well deserved rest,xx.

  18. Lori DiNardi says:

    Wonderful news and nice photos. Now, time to take care of the care taker. 😉 Zzzz

  19. Barb says:

    It’s always hardest on the caretaker – well maybe not the pain part. Hope you’re getting some rest. Take a photo of Barry and the walker for posterity. Hope you UP weather is good. Snow is forecast for Breck this week, but I’m in Denver enjoying spring flowers.

    • Kathy says:

      OK, must take walker photos for posterity, Barb! (Hadn’t thought of that.) Our UP weather is ccccold. No snow, but very few spring flowers yet either. We’re in between… Enjoy your Colorado week!

  20. john says:

    Seeing Barry’s smiling face and hearing you got a good nap makes my heart glad. Keeping the good thoughts and prayers going !

    • Kathy says:

      John, we’re doing well here. Barry starts Physical Therapy in town tomorrow, and says he’s going back to work on Thursday. We’ll see… Thanks for the good thoughts and prayers, friend.

  21. Wow! Even the picture from the hospital room is amazing. Huge lake that Lake Superior! Take care of the care taker Kathy!

    • Kathy says:

      I thought it was a good idea to show Ms. Lake Superior outside the hospital window. She’s The Defining Landscape ’round here. Along with the woods. We can’t really see the lake from here in our woods, except maybe a tiny bit through the trees. (And both the caregiver and patient are doing fine now.)

  22. Cee Neuner says:

    It’s always harder on the care-taker!!! Both of you take care of yourselves.

    • Kathy says:

      Hello, Cee! I think both of us are doing better after the weekend. His leg is pretty bruised, though… I appreciate your good words.

  23. Christina says:

    Really glad to hear that Barry’s surgery went so well, Kathy! But make sure to schedule some time for yourself—get some rest and eat some high nutrient dense foods!

    • Kathy says:

      We’re having a lovely vegan curried lentils and cauliflower dish over brown rice tonight. A friend of ours who is getting her knee replacement in a few weeks shared the recipe. It looks good… Thanks for the good wishes, Christina.

      • Christina says:

        Oooh, that sounds delicious, Kathy!! A dish that’s perfect for warming and healing the body. I was actually just thinking of you because I am, incidentally in the UP right now at my mom’s and I made her banana ice cream last night for dessert and she LOVED it! I hope it turned out for you 🙂

  24. Dana says:

    Oh, Kathy– I hope you have been able to take care of yourself since writing this post, too! I think you were/are feeling so tired because caretaking is such a deep form of giving– a truly selfless gesture. Sending my continued thoughts for Barry’s recovery and your well-being, too. 🙂

    • Kathy says:

      Oh thank you, Dana! I think I have (mostly) revived. And our patient continues to revive daily, thank the lucky stars. I know you have given selflessly with your caretaking lately, too, dear friend. May the lucky stars beam down on you as your season unfolds.

  25. Joanne says:

    Barry has been having a lovely rest in hospital hasn’t he?

    And here you are, thinking “Barry’s the one it’s happening to, I shouldn’t feel so tired, so stressed. It’s not about me, it’s about Barry”, aren’t you? So you battle on. I know. I’ve been there, a long time ago, and cracked after one year of being the strong carer.

    Take good care of yourself too Kathy…please? Sending love and prayers to both of you. xxx

    • Kathy says:

      He’s been out since Friday, Joanne, be he did have a lovely rest in the hospital–what am I saying? He barely slept at all! Nurses kept coming in to poke & prod at all hours. He’s sleeping now, though, after his first physical therapy session. I can’t imagine being a caretaker for a long period of time. I honor you for having done that, and I suspect there were many, many days when you didn’t crack… Love, Kathy

  26. Carol says:

    Happy to hear the patient is doing well. I have determined that being a caretaker absolutely demands afternoon naps.

    • Kathy says:

      I could probably take caretaking lessons at your feet, oh, Carol. I love afternoon naps. Have already had one today! I’ll bet you’re snoozing away now. 🙂

  27. Brenda Hardie says:

    Hi Kathy 🙂 It’s Tuesday and I am finally catching up after returning from my sister’s. I sure hope you got some good sleep and are feeling refreshed now. I know from experience just how exhausting the job of caretaker can be! Please remember to take extra good care of yourself, even though your mind is more on dear hubby 🙂 I’m glad he is recovering well and is home now…you will both feel better being at your haven in the woods ♥ Oh gosh….the view from the hospital room is incredible!
    Hope you had a beautiful Easter Kathy ♥ On to the next….:)

    • Kathy says:

      Brenda, it’s lovely to see you again! I’ll bet you know so much more than me about being a good caretaker. I am just a baby caretaker. 🙂 Glad you liked the view. We are happy, happy to be home and to have the first physical therapy session under his belt. We even went out for breakfast today! Hope you had a lovely Easter, too, my friend.

      • Brenda Hardie says:

        Thank you Kathy…it was a lovely Easter 🙂 I am so glad Barry is doing well….I am envious of pain-free knees.

  28. CMSmith says:

    It gets a lot easier. It really does. And your patient looks like a good sport.

    And W0W. You had an eighth floor water view. I am jealous.

    • Kathy says:

      I think it’s so funny that both of our knee patients were on the 8th floor! It already feels like it’s getting better, and am relieved that the physical therapist thinks the swelling is normal. Yesterday his FOOT turned purple! Bruising all down the leg. I think the height of my exhuastion was last weekend. Can’t imagine how good we’ll feel in 3 months. No. In four months he’s going to have the second knee done. Our doc wouldn’t do both at the same time.

      • CMSmith says:

        Our doctor only did it somewhat grudgingly and made it quite clear that he and the hospital would be losing money on it.

        I know that double replacement is a bad idea for many people, but when you’re relatively young, strong, and healthy, it seems to me overall it would cost the medical industry less. The insurance companies are not on board with it and won’t pay the doctors and hospitals. It’s a travesty, I think, and not in the best interest of some of the patients, particularly the younger ones.

        • Kathy says:

          Losing MONEY on it???!!!! My goodness… I wonder how Barry would have fared with the double knee replacement. He certainly wouldn’t have been back at work… he wished he could have waited until retirement to have these dang knees replaced. Wondering, is it permissible to ask?, how old is your husband? Barry is 55.

  29. It might be worth a short stay in that hospital for the view from the 8th floor.
    Caregivers receive an extra star in their crown….just thought you should know 🙂

  30. Catching up with my blog reading after our vacation… Kathy, caregiving is an exhausting occupation, an emotional roller coaster ride between frustration and satisfaction and all points in between. Barry will improve soon so that’s a blessing. Hope you got some rest! *hugs*

    • Kathy says:

      I shall have to read where you went on vacation, Barbara. Hope you had a wonderful time. I know you understand about caretaking. We are still concerned about Barry’s swelling–edema–so will return to the doctor if it continues. Trying to do everything necessary for complete healing…

  31. Marianne says:

    Oh that’s so funny, Kathy. You were all pooped out too. lol! Glad to hear Barry’s doing well. Maybe you gave all your energy to him. lol!

    • Kathy says:

      I hope you continue to feel more energetic, Marianne. Barry and I have commented more than once how much of his energy seems to be going into healing.

Thank you for reading. May you be blessed in your life...may you find joy in the simple things...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s