Splashing
Do you remember waiting for your date to arrive in the driveway with his rattletrap ’69 Chevy, sitting behind living room curtains, waiting, waiting, what if he doesn’t show up?
Do you remember waiting to birth your first baby, big and uncomfortable and half-nervous, please, just let’s get this over with, I can’t last another minute of swollen irritability, and may the baby please be born safe with all ten fingers and ten toes?
Do you remember waiting to hear if you got the job, if you succeeded in that interview when you were oh-so-nervous, thinking what you could have said, should have said, how you want this job, please Universe, you really want this job?
Do you remember when your sixteen-year-old took the car for a spin, just a little spin, and the roads slicked with ice and you waited, heart pounding as the minutes stretched longer than the road to town, longer than it might take to spin into the ditch, to hit a tree, to slide into perilous possibility?
Waiting for minutes to tick by. Waiting for hours to tick by. Waiting for today to pass. Waiting for this month, this year, this lifetime…
Waiting to hear if your precious daughter weathered Hurricane Sandy in New York City.
Tick, tock, tick, tock.
Waiting for dark
Waiting.
What kind of waiter are you? Are you patient? Are you impatient? Do you tap your toes with nervousness? Do you stuff your mouth with chocolate? Do you drink wine?
Or are you calm and blase, trusting implicitly in the Universe to deliver exactly what is needed on the doorstep of your expectations?
Someday soon~~when I’m entirely grown up and mature~~that’s how I’m going to be.
I am going to Trust the Universe 100%.
In the meantime, toes tap and I don’t know where to turn. A mother’s heart is sometimes worried.
I cruise the news about Superstorm Sandy’s wrath and ponder at what point to write the Red Cross (they just put up a site where you can let your family know that you’re safe, just in case they’re worrying.) Last night I checked the CNN blog well, let’s just say, too many times to record without embarrassment.
This morning it said 50 homes burned in Queens, the home of my loved one. I immediately called up a map to measure the distance between Breezy Point neighborhood and my bebs. No, her house wasn’t nearby.
Bless those who lost their homes…
Waiting for morning’s light
Last night a tree fell on a house in Queens and killed a 30-year-old man. I phoned–for the sixth time yesterday–to make sure her boyfriend was OK.
“He’s 29!” my patient daughter reassured.
I don’t think that will make much difference to the mama who is grieving her son today.
Feasibly, one might wait days and days and days to hear news of your loved one–if the electricity and cell phone towers are destroyed. You could wait through breakfast, lunch and dinner for days, worrying, fussing, trying not to worry, trying not to fuss, praying, sending positive thoughts, trying to send positive thoughts, now what’s that Red Cross site anyway?
And then, maybe five days down the road, your phone will ring and it’s your love one with her power restored, her phone working, everything’s OK, Mom, really, Mom, c’mon quit crying, Mom, everything is FINE!
But guess what, dear reader?
Just as I was writing about this Waiting game, this game we humans play–an email zipped in my inbox. It said:
good morning, we are fine and still have power. didn’t want you to be worried as the headlines look a little ominous. don’t think i have work as it doesn’t sound like the subways will be running anytime soon. also, my work probably doesn’t have power.
Safe
Lake Superior Spirit 
I’ve left mom waiting a few too many times over the years. You guys are troopers. Not looking forward to the day when I’m in your shoes and my kids are far away keeping me waiting! 😉
Awww, Jilly, I’ll bet you’ve given your mom a few gray hairs, too! But it sounds like you–like your cousin–totally gets it. We moms have to be troopers to make it through…
Glad to hear that Kiah is okay. I do feel for all the families who are waiting and especially for those that will not here the news they hope for, that their loved ones are safe and sound. I am not good at waiting either. I can’t count the number of times I’ve sat in hospital waiting rooms waiting to hear how the surgery went. It’s hard to trust that no matter what happens it’s going to be all right when it’s someone you love that’s hanging in the balance.
Good morning, Lisa. Oh, yes, hospital waiting rooms…never thought of that agony of waiting when writing the blog. That would be the worst kind of waiting. Have had to do that more than a couple of times this year…
Big Hugs and a smile and eyes full of tears at your joy of relief! I/we are fine here too! The news says over a million of us are without power. There are several thousand in my county, I am not one of them. We had normal rain, a bit more than normal wind. It got warm, so I opened a window and listened to the wind and the rain. I waited and waited for the giant storm, waited for the power to go out. Wondered if the media had ANY connection with reality! Chided me for waiting for disaster like stopping to stare at a car crash. I am glad all is well here, perhaps I might see if anyone within my reach might need some help. Will go out later after travel restrictions are lifted and see how other parts of our area fared. Thanks for sharing your space and writing this post.
Awww, Elisa, you are so sweet! I figured it was my god-given Responsibility to get on over here & write a blog first thing this morning~~though didn’t know there would be such good news by the end of the writing. Isn’t it fascinating–and morbid–the way we wait for disaster like staring at a car crash. Yet we do. So happy that you are thinking of helping others within your reach. You have a big heart.
I hate waiting and I’m a horrible ‘waiter’. I was, however, a great waitress…So very glad your daugher is ok. I have many friends on the east coast and have been thinking of all of them-so far I think everyone is fine but I’m still worried.
smiling, Annie. I thought about waiters in the restaurant context when writing this post. It’s interesting that servers are called waiters when really it’s the people at tables who are waiting…. Hope all your friends on the East Coast are fine. We’ve been so worried by this storm, haven’t we?
Kathy! That is such great news that Kiah is safe and sound! I know you must have had a very sleepless night. I am a terrible waiter…although many people would disagree. They seem to think I handle waiting very well. So, perhaps I hide my anxiousness and keep it hidden inside. But that is not healthy either. It does help to pray, which I do in force when my anxiety rises and I am stuck in the waiting mode.
Again, I am so happy for your good news this morning! ♥
Brenda, it’s weird. I actually slept well all last night, which is strange. After I turned off the computer and hung up from talking to Kiah my heart was very peaceful. Strange. Thanks for all your love and Presence through this waiting time. Blessings to you!
So glad that Kiah is safe. I am not good at waiting particularly when waiting to hear news of my daughter.
Yep, Kerry, I know EXACTLY what you mean! I’m glad K is safe, too.
🙂
I feel the bath of warm comfort and relief that traveled over you when you got Kiah’s email this morning. I’m so grateful and happy for you. The worst “waiting” for me concerning my babies was during the 1989 Big Earthquake in SF. My girls were at track practice, and I was home … some 10 miles separating us. We were ordered not to drive so I couldn’t go get them. I was trapped not knowing whether or not they were okay, safe! No phone service. I started out on foot to go to them! Aftershocks sent me back home as I couldn’t even keep my footing and balance. Three hours later, their track coach brought them safely home to a mother wrecked with worry and panic. I bawled my head off for 30 minutes! A mother’s heart is like no other! May Kiah, Diah (sp) and all stay safe as we wait for the storm to pass. Hugs!!!
Awww, Susan, this is a lovely comment~~I can not even imagine the worries you must have felt during that earthquake. I remember watching scenes of that on TV. Your precious little twins at their track practice. I do not doubt you would set out on foot to rescue them! Now I have little tears in MY eyes. Yes…safety for all our loved ones… Thank you.
Oh, thank you, Kathy for this update today. I know your own heart is so very relieved. I was thinking of your dear one. I went to yoga class last night; and on my long drive (30 mins one way) to get there, I was listening to NPR; and on my drive home, I was still listening to NPR. Their NYC office was on generator; and yes, I truly and really was thinking of you and your dear one; and sending little quiet prayers of affirmation, that all was truly well for her. It is wondrous to know that is so.
Thank you for thinking of my dear one, Deb. I am always thinking how similar our trips to the “city” are. Ours takes about 45 long minutes. We’re heading up there today for chiropractor appointments. Thank you for the prayers of affirmation. I kinda fell apart in the nervousness department yesterday.
Very happy to read that Kiah is safe and sound. After seeing some of those reports last night, I wondered about how some of my blogger friends and family fared. You must be greatly relieved!
My friend Kathy, with whom you have so much in common, had a son in Japan during their devastating tsunami a couple of years ago, so you can probably imagine how frayed her nerves were when she did not hear from him for a couple of days.
Hope the worst of Sandy is over so you can relax and shed your veil of worry. 🙂
Greatly relieved, Susan, you would not believe how relieved. Can NOT imagine having a son in Japan during that tsunami, how terrible that would have been for those couple of days!! My nerves yesterday were nothing compared to that. (And my veil of worry is completely gone. Strange how quickly we can recover from the throes of nervousness, isn’t it?) Thank you!
Waiting is painful. I nodded my head in sympathy the entire I read your post. So glad your loved ones are okay. I guess my most poignant current waiting time has been when my daughter has been in labor (3 times in last 4 1/2 years) and her darling husband texts me every 30 minutes or so (she always has long labors) and I just sit by the cell phone….waiting. Fortunately, each wait has ended well.
Pamela, I suspected that many might be nodding their heads over and over again saying, Yep, Yep, Oh Yep. As for daughters in labor~~my goodness!~~have never ever pondered that particular form of waiting. So glad, so very glad, that each wait has ended well.
These human emotions do get in the way of trusting the universe sometimes. Gosh Kathy, I don’t have kids, but my heart was pounding for you. I was hoping you’d have an update on your Kiah this morning. Thank you for letting us know. It’s such a large part of our country that is effected. They’re being held in prayers and warm thoughts from here. Hugs to you.
Oh Lori, that is so sweet that you were so concerned! Thank goodness I updated early. Never really thought that I might be getting others all worried about Kiah, too. (As well as all the others in the storm’s path.) Thank goodness she emailed early. Phew… Thank you again, a hundred times.
So glad to hear all is well with Kiah. 🙂 I’m the same way when it comes to waiting for news from my children, or if my husband is away, from him. I’m still waiting to hear from some of my family in NJ, but I suspect they are all okay. I’ve never been a great fan of Facebook, but became one last night as I got news via their status reports throughout the night.
As I mentioned in reply to your other comment, I agree that there are positive parts to FB. Yesterday and this morning have been watching status updates, too. Have you had any effects from the storm there in your bogs? It’s windy here and gray, but otherwise we’re on the far reaches.
We still have power this morning so that’s a good thing. It’s still too windy and rainy to get outside and have a look around. From the sounds of the wind and lashing rain last night (which kept me awake until the wee hours of the morning), I expect to find roof shingles on the ground, and possibly a few downed trees or at least some large branches thrown down. All in all, I’m grateful. It could have been much worse.
Thanks for the update, Robin. Sounds like a rough night!
I’m so glad to hear your good news! Thanks for sharing it so quickly; my thoughts were on you and your daughter as I saw the news reports. I was worried, too, and waiting to hear. In your position, I have been paralyzed by fear, unable to stop checking for phone calls or messages, unable to do anything else. I can almost feel your relief!
Cindy, it’s amazing how many of you care so much thinking about Kiah’s safety–as well as others in the path of this storm. I was kinda paralyzed yesterday. Thank goodness she emailed so quickly! Phew…thank you again for your concern.
I’m so relieved finally to hear that Kiah is safe! I also panic the same way like you when there’s any disturbance in the weather and until I hear from my Mom or sisters or brother. Its such a joy once you know that all are safe.
“Sandy” has caused a huge damage to the city there. I saw the news this morning. Power cuts and evacuation of several families and the floods, Gawwwdd!!! 😦
Yep, Sonali, it’s so hard when we’re separated from our loved ones during Mother Nature’s disturbances. Especially when we’re separated by distance. Yes, it looks like Sandy has caused huge damage. So very hard for so many! Thank you for your concern.
You had me going there for a while, Kathy. I’m extremely glad Kiah and her boyfriend are safe and that they, in fact, have power(Yay!) From the news I’m seeing out of New York, the situation is absolutely devastating. Thank goodness for the emergency workers and all the people helping to rescue those in need. Thanks so much for this update Kathy. I was very concerned about your daughter during the night while I watched the news broadcasts. 🙂
Seriously, Marianne, when I started writing this post I had no idea whether Kiah was OK or not. No idea whether the waiting game would last for hours or days. Fortunately, half way through the writing her email came in. Phew! That turned the direction of the blog from nervousness to quiet relief. thank goodness for emergency workers…oh yes… Thank you so much, my friend!
Amen!
Amen, Lucinda. Thank you so much.
I hate waiting. Hate, hate, hate…… waiting and I don’t get along very well. I’m trying to teach my children how to be patient, so I have to pretend that I’m good at it!! 😉 If I were you, and one of my kids were close to the storm, I would be in full panic mode, checking as many websites as possible – putting my life on hold until I had answers. I am so happy that your daughter is OK! My heart aches for those who were hurt or killed, and their families….. ♥
I am laughing out loud at your impatience, Holly~~and then having to teach kids about patience! Just talked with my daughter now and she doesn’t have to go back to work until Monday. There is no power still where she works in Manhattan. I, too, feel so badly about those hurt and killed. So horrible…
Good news regarding your daughter Kathy and I share your sentiments for others who are still waiting or facing the loss of a loved one.
Thank you, Terrill. It was such an emotional day waiting for Sandy to roll in and feeling afraid. It seems there keeps being news about more people being killed by the hurricane. So sad.
I watched the coverage on a NYC channel for awhile last night – the devastation is absolutely unimaginable! I can certainly understand why you worried about Kia – I would have been the same. So very glad all is okay with her.
Carol, the news is both a godsend and a challenge. I swear if I hadn’t access to the news I would have been much calmer. On the other hand, it’s good to know what’s happening. I am glad that all turned out well for our family. Feeling sorry for the families who are grieving today.
Great, Kia is o.k.; my nephew, Greg, in Brooklyn is o.k.; and my daughter also zipped me an email from Boston to say they were o.k.
Your waiting post is marvelous. Don’t think I could write one so eloquently!
May the Universe bless those less fortunate who are still waiting.
Phew, good thing those we know are OK, Linda! Triple Phew. Thank you for enjoying this writing. (You’re in my good books for that compliment, lol.) I am very sad about those who may still be waiting, all these days later.
Kathy, I was smiling as I read Kiah’s email and felt so happy for you all. I am not too good at waiting. On this devastating September 11 years ago, I tried to phone a dear friend in Manhattan. It was impossible to reach her until the next day. A long and very worrying waiting. Today, same thing, Margy lives now in NJ and I had to wait for a decent American time (7 hours difference between us) to call her. She is safe, a lot of wind last night but no danger now. I truly sympathize with all those who are still waiting. Thank you Kathy for this wonderful post, mother’s feelings and words so well expressed.
Dear Isa, I am glad that you were happy. (I probably should not have posted her email without asking her, but, gosh, I was so excited!) I can’t imagine having a friend or family member in NYC on 9/11. That must have been so awful. So terribly frightening. I am now thinking of all those who are still waiting for news of loved ones all these days later.
Oh yes!!……..my daughter is in Brooklyn and it was a rough night indeed. I am not a good waiter either, sleepless night worrying, waiting waiting…….but I’m lucky, my Amy is also just fine! Thanks for sharing in such an eloquent way!!
Phyllis, we are Mothers-in-Arms! I am glad to know I wasn’t alone, fretting about my NYC daughter. Glad to hear that Amy is fine. Glad that you paused and shared this comment!
I’m so happy for you (and Kiah and Diaa (sp??)) that your dear ones are safe. You’ve described the awfulness that is waiting to a T. I am relentless with mental imagery when I’m waiting. I try to push those ugly thoughts away, but they come back unbidden only to be shoved aside once more.
Hi Ms. Heather, I am glad that we have had similar experiences in Impatience. No, I am not glad. I wish that both of us grow into patience. That’s my hopes for both of us.
I am so happy for you – I do not “wait” well either and I am so glad you daughter is so thoughtful. Down here near Windsor/Detroit in my small town of Kingsville, the electricity was off most of the night, on for a bit, then off until midmorning–it is on again now–hopefully it will stay on now–but at least we are on the edge of the storm and not anywhere near where your daughter is and getting the brunt of it.
Hello Ms. LouAnn! I am so glad that your electricity came on so quickly. I hope that it stayed on. Wondering if there were as huge of waves on Lake Michigan as they said were going to be. Here on Superior it was windy and choppy, but not terribly unusual. Today it’s spitting snow. Welcome, Winter!
brrrrrrr!
It did not feel that quick, but we are so spoiled. Your daughter is okay, I take it? Much calmer here today, still a bit windy and cool and rainy but at least we have had some breaks.
I know what you mean that it wouldn’t feel quick. That would have felt long to me. But thinking in hindsight…it was probably quick compared to many. Happy Halloween!
so true–it was nothing compared to what happened to so many –Happy Halloween
Thank goodness your wait is over and Kiah is fine. I’m trying to think back to my last big wait, and I believe it was a bit over 5 years ago when our D-I-L couldn’t wait and went into labor way way way too soon (9 weeks too soon) with our grandson. He was born and whisked to the NICU, so we waited for hours, days, weeks, and finally a month to learn he was going to be fine – all OK – perfect. I still get emotional thinking about him. So thankful!
Oh, my, that is the saddest story, Barb. But in the end, it is a most delightful story because your grandson was safe and well. I am getting emotional imagining it. But grateful alongside of you. (Thanks for the email, by the way!!! tee hee…)
Once you are a parent, you will wait until you leave your bodily existence.
Oh c’mon, John, can’t we grow up spiritually before that? (P.S. I saw your fence today! It looks awesome! Darn good job.)
I think it depends on the situation as to the type of “waiter” I am. When it comes to the mama-waiter, I am a nervous wreck!! ❤
We mama-waiters are the worst, Stacy. Although I heard today of a mama-waiter here in town with a daughter in NYC who was cool & calm as a Cucumber. She is my new heroine.
Mine too!
As I was reading your post I thought of Civil War mothers who waited months and sometimes forever to find out where their sons were…and World War I and II mothers, and Korean War mothers…and all the rest…people who didn’t have web sites to check, cell phones to use. We should be grateful that we have these resources. Still. If I were a mother I’d be calling regularly in times of crisis, I wouldn’t be a toe tapping patient Mom.
I know on 9/11 my brother, who was in NYC on business called my mother immediately, and she called all of us (most of us didn’t even know he was traveling that day). That was a time when we were grateful for technology for sure.
I know there are a lot of families out there waiting still…and some already grieving. Tonight I will remember them and be grateful that my people are all safe and sound and that I KNOW they are all safe and sound.
Dawn, I can NOT even imagine Civil War mothers waiting and waiting and waiting. We have grown so accustomed to our instant communication we probably can’t even wait for a day before becoming impatient. Glad to hear you’re a toe tapper, too. Glad also to hear that your brother was able to get through to your mom. Phew! Blessings to all who still wait…
Glad all is well for your daughter, and you.
My brother was leading a college class trip to China and was in Tiananmen Square the night the troops began moving in. That was an anxious time, waiting to hear that all was OK.
or how about when my daughter was in Hong Kong, modelling, at the age of 17 !!!
Oh Sybil–Tiananmen Square, oh no! I would have been a Nervous Wreck! As for your daughter modeling in Hong Kong at 17–that sounds like my niece Jillian. She was in Singapore and Japan and all those places. Does you daughter still model?
Bless your heart! Somedays being a Mama is the hardest job in the world. And in a minute it becomes your proudest accomplishment. Glad to hear all is well.
Sandi, do you have kids? It sounds like you must–you understand so implicitly! All is well. Hope all is well with all your friends and family, too.
No particular story about waiting, but wanted to tell you that as a momma now myself, I can definitely relate and I can only imagine how you’re feeling! Thanks for keeping us posted — thoughts and prayers to you all!
Jen, I just told Kiah what you said here! Isn’t it interesting how once you have precious little ones, you suddenly totally get it? Your heart totally gets it anyway. You love them so much…and never ever want them hurt or in danger. Love to you! Hugs, too.
Waiting for news is tough … I get some of my best house cleaning done during those wait times. 😉 (keeping busy with brainless activity makes the time go faster). Glad to hear your news was good news.
Bearyweather, I have so missed you! I have been waiting for you, too. 🙂 Hoping all was OK in your world and you were just Busy with your School. I know what you mean about house cleaning when you’re waiting. How come I didn’t think of THAT on Monday, darn it? **big smile to see you again!**
Sorry, I have been a horrible blogger lately and not stopping by to visit everyone as I should. Although I have several new posts started at my home blogging site, I have really only had time to put up a few photos for the wordpress challenges on my photo blog,/a>.
However, it may surprise you to know I am actually blogging more than ever.
I introduced by digital media students to blogging (we are using Edublog with is part of wordpress safe for schools) and each student now has a photo blog of their own. Fortunately (or unfortunately) the students are enjoying themselves and I am having a terrible time keeping up with all of their blogs. I am trying to do better …. I missed way too many of my favorite bloggers posts over the last month or so … I have missed you, too.
So glad to hear you are OK, bearyweather. It’s OK to not blog regularly…but you know some of us will be concerned that you’re alright. Glad you are having fun with your students and blogging!
Just popping in from Mexico for a quick dose of Kathy 🙂
Man, you are the bestest, Laurie! Happy Day of the Dead! I have read your blog, but am still planning on coming back & commenting. Hope you’re having so much fun! I know you are.
Hi Kathy, When my son deployed to Kuwait and we knew he was in the front lines of the invasion of Iraq I about went nuts. We said goodbye to him on Feb. 26 and did not get a call or email until May 15th. My only consolation was that the doorbell did not ring – although it sure did in my nightmares! The worry/tension/fear I had that year cost me my health and part of my colon. I have learned the value of being Zen the hard way. I know I cannot control things (even with all my motherly love). I am so glad your situation is one of relief and thankfulness.
Hugs
SuZen
SuZen, the thought of worrying about a child in the military has scared me since–well, since Chris was a little boy. Can’t imagine how you must have felt. I am so sorry for that year of stress on you. I want to hug you big time. But, yes, there are lessons we learn from these challenging times. Hugs…
I am so pleased to hear your daughter is safe. I am not good at waiting when I am worried, I hover at the window, as if that is going to make any difference! ahh we are a funny lot.
Dear Me, I know what you mean about hovering at the window. What else are we going to do but keep peering out, waiting for some resolution. Funny lot? Yes, the funniest!
Glad you got the good news from your daughter, Kathy!
I was so glad, too, Pamela. Hope you aren’t waiting to hear from any friends or family on the East Coast.
Another excellent post Kathy. I loved the conversation after a tree fell on a house in Queens and killed a 30-year-old man.
I phoned–for the sixth time yesterday–to make sure her boyfriend was OK.
“He’s 29!” my patient daughter reassured.
What a good daughter to get up early and let you know she’s OK. I love her name.
I wrote a post last year about the euphemisms people use when they ask me for the restroom, and it too got some hits during the storm. People were desperate!
Rosie, your post from last year is great! Loved reading it! I am glad you liked our conversation. She’s a good daughter. We are very close. (I think she’s almost forgiven me for quoting her email verbatim here. lol!)
Oh Kathy, I feel for you. I would be doing the exact same thing, checking every news source possible, telephoning whoever I could. I’m glad your story had a happy ending. Hopefully your daughter will get through the aftermath without too much trouble. It’s going to be bad around there for quite a while, I’m afraid. Take care.
It does sound like it’s going to be challenging there for awhile. For example, many companies can’t send out paychecks until they get back to work–so workers are without pay until electricity starts. Glad to hear we would be the same with our worry factor.
Ah Kathy, our mama-hearts will be with us forever. I don’t think it matters if they are 6 or 76. So glad Kiah was able to get in touch with you so quickly and that she’s OK. Can only imagine what that must have been like, to be in the path of such a storm. Or waiting to hear. xx
Oh our sweet mama hearts, Colleen! May they forever love!
I’m an impatient waiter Kathy, pacing, fidgetting and unable to eat or drink, when anxiety takes hold. I’m so pleased to hear that your beautiful Kiah is safe and sound and your mama’s heart can be peaceful again. Sending love to you all. xxx
It sounds like many of us are impatient mamas (and some papas, too!) You know what else is so interesting? How we can be so impatient and frantic and then once we hear our loved ones are safe–it’s like it never even happened. The inner waters return to stillness. I feel your love, Joanne. Thank you!
So happy to hear that all is well, Kathy! Phew!
Dana, you’re making me re-live these posts! I couldn’t remember when I was playing a Waiting Game…or what about. Thank goodness it all turned out well!