Lately I have been enjoying writing blogs that seem to reconcile stuck, limited, or judging viewpoints within.
Something arises. Some judgment, some feeling, some sorrow, something that’s not yet integrated.
Perhaps it has to do with a friendship. A sense of longing. Something deep inside which wants to be accepted, yet there’s still a pushing away, a not-allowing. Perhaps it’s an anger, a sorrow, a not-understanding.
I sit and type, letting the deepest self share its thoughts.
Then–instead of turning too quickly in the next moment–or too compulsively looking toward your comments or visits–it seems that the words in the blog are felt on a deeper level. I feel the truth in the words, to understand, to allow.
It often feels like a big ah-ha of understanding. It feels like it translates into true realization, into something real which can inform the next action.
The great and powerful longing helped me to allow, to more assuredly accept, a longing that is a part of most of us. To not push it away. To honor it. To more deeply relax in its presence.
Up all night birthing a goat felt like the heart sighing in relief. More assuredly allowing the diversity of all of us. I could feel this in my bones. Not pushing anything away. Allowing a greater love to birth in this moment.
Yesterday’s post Made of dreams and dandelion fuzz addressed something which was pushing away dreaming, as well as something that loved dreaming. After writing it, this heart cracked open in joy. Something wordless felt understood, some judgment dissolved. The opposites within reconciled.
I don’t know about you, but I have a tendency to push away some painful or seemingly objectionable parts of life. Blogging from a higher perspective–from the larger view–from the eye of the eagle–allows for integration. If I allow the words to sink into feelings, to stay with the expansion until it flowers into realization.
If you, the reader, find anything which relaxes your heart, makes you more deeply accept this moment from these posts–well, that’s only an added bonus. I read your comments so often and smile, feeling like we’re kindred spirits, that we care about the rich inner life, the lifetime of shedding light in dim corners.
Blogging suddenly feels like planting seeds and watching plants sprout and flowers bloom. It often feels like illumination, reconciliation, deep peace.
Does blogging help you figure things out? Has it helped you love and accept yourself even more?