Yesterday my friend and I had our every-other-week dyad time together. We’ve been meeting together almost two years now, since we met in a spiritual class in fall, 2018.
May I share the format that our teacher suggested–and that we’ve followed faithfully month after month?
We connect over Zoom at our favorite time of 9 a.m. on Tuesday and smile to see each other once again. (OK, often we laugh as we say hello.)
First, we sit in silence with our eyes closed for seven minutes. Then one of us shares or speaks from our Heart, our experience, our felt-sense of reality. We divulge what’s coming up in the moment. The other person doesn’t interrupt, doesn’t say anything. She/he looks in the eyes of the other and allows everything to arise and be met. It’s a sacred space where we’re allowed to be vulnerable, open, cry, laugh, sing, be silent.
We wear so many masks in our world as we connect with other human beings. The spiritual dyad resembles a sacred shell of Presence where we can truly be ourselves. We talk in ways that seem forbidden in everyday casual conversation.
The dyad is a safe container because we never, ever, mention what our partner shares. It’s so sacred. Trust builds up, encounter after encounter, as the truly vulnerable parts of ourselves learn that it’s safe to trust and relax, safe to share words and feelings we may have never spoken aloud to anyone before.
After the first person shares for twenty minutes, we sit in silence for another seven minutes. Then the second person shares as the first person looks in her/his eyes providing space for the Heart.
I can’t even begin to describe how beautiful this is. How rare to meet another human being in this way.
We end with another seven minutes of silence before casually chatting about our everyday life for a few minutes and then saying goodbye, see you in two weeks.
I felt scared to ask my dyad partner if it was OK to share about our practice here on the blog…because it’s so darn sacred. The shell of another person’s trust at this level of communication is a precious thing. I would not want to do anything to disrespect this container.
(If we ever discover ourselves inadvertently screwing up by almost-mentioning a sacred share we say “Oops!” and apologize immediately. It’s rarely if ever happened over the past two years, but I can remember saying “Oops”…)
It truly is one of the most valuable sharings that I’ve experienced with another human being.
P.S. My dyad partner said yes, it’s OK to share on the blog, thank you for asking. And she is the one who called our committed sharing space a “shell”. I thought that was so beautiful. ❤
Day 4 of a seventy-five day journey to more deeply connect with God, Spirit, Holy, Love…to explore “What the Heart Knows” during the waning days of 2020.