“Drop kick me, Jesus, through the goal posts of life”

Bears dancing during our recent blizzard, right?

Bears dancing during our recent blizzard, right?

Hi guys!

I am so sorry that my blog has practically flat-lined these days.  No excuses.  It’s just flat-lined.  And the line is covered with snow.

Snow, snow, snow.  That’s all we think about these days.  You can start a conversation talking about anything–politics, religion, friendships–and it all comes back to the same thing.   “How much snow you got?  Are you finished shoveling out?  How’s your plowing doing?”

The answer to the above questions are:

a)  We got 17-22 inches in that last blizzard, thank you very much, how much did YOU get?

b)  No. We are Not finished shoveling out yet.  Please come over.  Bring an extra shovel or two.  I will feed you cookies (not that they’re sweet cookies.  They’re healthy cookies.  If you’re interested in health, you can have one of those oatmeal cookies.  If you’re suspicious, I don’t blame you.  Please have a cup of tea instead. Or beer.  If you’re a beer drinker that drinks IPA’s.  We’ve got about six of them in the frig downstairs.)

c)  Our plowing is at a stand-still.  Kind of flat-lined, just like my blog.  Not for lack of trying, my friends!  We spent five hours yesterday plowing out that wet, heavy, unheard-of, crazy, wet-blue snow.  Five hours!  And we’ve only accomplished two-thirds of the driveway.    My car is still buried.  I will show you a picture of my buried car from two days ago.  Pity party welcome!

Is this a Chevy Malibu or a lump of snow?

So we’re still on the topic of snow, right?

Never mind politics–that will all be there after the snow has melted.  Never mind religion–that we can discuss in June.

I want to tell you this.

When you’re young and in love with the North Woods, shoveling snow is a breeze.  You laugh, you giggle, you toss snow this way and that.  You’re pioneers!  You’re adventurers!  You’re in LOVE with the snow, the wildness, the adventure of it all!

When you’ve lived here for almost 40 years, and your age now talks about social security, and your body starts protesting the endless hours of shoveling and plowing and roof-raking, it’s Another Matter Entirely.

Me in Grandma's 1969 snowmobile suit which is still (barely) existing

Me in Grandma’s 1969 snowmobile suit which is still (barely) existing

Which brings me to the crux of the matter.  What happens when you’re cooped up in a blizzard Too Long.

You start trying to entertain your significant other in any way that will gain a laugh.

And gain a laugh happened on Sunday morning during the height of the blizzard.

My husband woke up singing a line from this obscure song by Bobby Bare:  Drop Kick me Jesus.

It was Sunday morning, after all.

“Drop kick me, Jesus, through the goal posts of life!”

I started laughing so hard that the snow stopped for five minutes!  (Not true, but wouldn’t that have been something if it really happened?)

Drop kick me Jesus through the goalposts of life
End over end neither left nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goalposts of life
Make me, oh make me Lord more than I am
Make a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly temptation below
I’ve got the will Lord if you’ve got the toe
Drop kick me Jesus through the goalposts of life
End over end neither left nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goalposts of life
Bring on the brothers who’ve gone on before
And all of the sisters who’ve knocked at your door
All the departed dear loved ones of mine
And stick ’em up front in the offensive line
Have ANY of you EVER heard of this song?
Snow beneath our deck.  Mostly shoveled off by Yours Truly

Snow beneath our deck. Mostly shoveled off by Yours Truly

My blogging friend, Dawn, asked recently if I had Cabin Fever after this winter of 200+ inches snow (in Marquette, anyway.  I have no idea how much snow lies on the ground in Aura, Michigan, except it’s deeper than my crotch, however many inches that may be…and we’ve got two months to go yet.))
“Cabin fever?” I may have replied to her, if only in my head, “No, I am doing just fine…”
However, after the “Drop Kick me Jesus” Sunday morning hysterics, it suddenly makes me wonder if we’re really doing “fine”…
I wouldn’t have even subjected yous guys (local vernacular) to this ridiculous Cabin Fever entertainment, except said husband just said he wrote this week’s column in his local newspaper about Jesus and the Goal Posts.  Just sayin’.  What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, and visa versa.
The only other Exciting News I can think to tell you is This.  We are headed to Positano, Italy, come June!  Exciting, right?  Our dear daughter and her fiance are tying the proverbial knot and we’re invited!
I promise to show you photos of this amazing city by the sea, unless Jesus drop kicks me through the goal posts of life before then.
Positano, as seen from the beach

Positano, as seen from the beach



About Kathy

I live in the middle of the woods in Michigan's Upper Peninsula. Next to Lake Superior's cold shores. I love to blog.
This entry was posted in February 2019 and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

44 Responses to “Drop kick me, Jesus, through the goal posts of life”

  1. Stacy says:

    I suppose this Southern girl still looks at being snowed in with the starry eyes of a youth. It seems so dreamy to me. To see it from your perspective, I have to remember the way I feel in October when it’s still 90+ degrees and long for a respite from the inferno. Have heart – your blog is not flat-lined at all. Still brings a smile to this face. XOXO

    • Kathy says:

      Oh good–a smile to your face, Stacy. That makes writing it totally worthwhile! And P.S. I still do like being snowed in. It’s just how much and for how long that’s still up for debate. 🙂

  2. debyemm says:

    Always good to have something happy to look forward to at times such as these . . . no I never heard the song but I can believe it actually exists.

    • Kathy says:

      Deb, I could NOT believe this song actually exists! Football and Jesus all together. I’m not really a football fan–or a fan of kicking–and in fact I once lost a front tooth on a goalpost. Just remembered this little incident right now. In 4th grade we were playing tag and the goalpost was “safe”. A sweet little girl ran into the goalpost to get safe and hit my mouth into it. Half of my front tooth cracked and shattered to pieces leading to years of pain and embarrassment. How interesting. How VERY interesting!

  3. Susan D. Durham says:

    So fun to read this blog, Kath! What a treat! Got me guffawing good, you did. Oh, I do hope there is an end in sight soon for the grueling unburying process. May your humor (and Barry’s) see you through, and then some. xoxoxo

    • Kathy says:

      I was picturing you guffawing all the time while writing it, Susan. YES, what a grueling season we’re having! I couldn’t believe that town wasn’t even plowed out yet yesterday. Lots of work going on. I saw the Fed Ex driver slip and fall in the road. Hard to see around snowbanks. And everyone & their brother was out & about after so many days of being stuck at home.

  4. Shirley Khodja says:

    Dear lord, no, I’ve never heard that song, but it’s a hoot! Thanks for the good laugh!

  5. Carol says:

    I’ve been out of our snow – which was nowhere near the depth of yours when I left – for nearly a week. The plan is to start home Thursday to hit the mountains Friday because the forecast shows a little sun, above freezing temps, and no falling snow. Gotta grab those breaks when you can.

    • Kathy says:

      Carol, I think I’ve seen a few pictures of your trip. How nice that you could get away for a week! You must be heading home as we speak. Hope you have “traveling mercies” as one of my friends say.

  6. jeffstroud says:

    Oh my! All we have had here is some off and on dreary weather, too much rain and a tiny bit of snow… Maybe you should have kept your moms Condo in FLA?

    • Kathy says:

      It certainly would be warmer and drier and more pleasant in Florida, Jeff! Thanks for stopping by to read my silly cabin-feverish blog. Wishing you good weather in your neck of the woods.

  7. Yes, I’ve heard of the song. No, I don’t have snow. I did get to visit yesterday where I used to live and found wildflowers coming up after all this California rain. I even found maidenhair ferns thriving under a massive patch of poison oak. I wasn’t wearing socks, the poison oak was ankle high, and It takes me about three days to break out. One down, two to go. By the end of the week I will be wishing for cabin fever because poison oak takes forever to go away on me. Councherblessings!

    • Kathy says:

      Esther, you poor thing–poison oak! I am really feeling for you. I am very allergic to poison ivy and have suffered tremendously from it in the past. The maidenhair ferns sounded lovely…but its companions were not. May you heal quickly!

  8. So very much enjoyed reading this, and we think we have “snow in Chicago”!

    • Kathy says:

      Jan, am wondering how much snow you have in Chicago. My mom lives downstate…I don’t know how much is on the ground, but their recent system brought about another three inches of snow. Glad you enjoyed reading our shenanigans. 🙂

      • I live in a Chicago suburb. Most of the snow now has melted. We had a storm with about 7″ of snow a couple of weeks ago. I think the south got hit harder than we did. Saw at least 50 robins in two trees near my house. So I know Spring is coming! But as I write this it is 11 degrees with a wind chill of 2 below zero right now. LoL

  9. rehill56 says:

    Thanks for the laugh! I’m sympathizing with your snow moving pain! That snow is just so hard to move and with so much of it, it’s near impossible!! We’ve been getting play by play info on this once in a life time snow-game. It’s had us on the edge of our seats (70 degree armchair quarterbacks that we are!)

    • Kathy says:

      Ruth, I am smiling at your football references–you armchair quarterbacks, you. Play by play info reminds me of talking to my mom on the phone every hour from the Florida condo. Hope Andrew is making it without major difficulties. I know some people who aren’t even shoveling their roofs–some are not even in the area. Hoping all our houses remain intact. We need to talk one of these days!

  10. I’ve been wondering how you’re doing over there, the weather reports and news segments are riveting. We haven’t had much snow this year, just a dusting here and there. Very unusual. Tonight we’re supposed to get 1-3 inches (!) but I have my doubts we’ll get more than another dusting. You’ve had much more than enough!

    Do you have enough food squirreled away, to get you through to spring, since you cannot get your car out?

    So glad you have your daughter’s wedding to look forward to in June. In Italy!!!

    I’ve never heard the song your husband sang…

    But Rod Stewart’s “Mandolin Wind” comes to mind when I get cabin fever:

    “Buffalo died in the frozen fields you know
    Through the coldest winter in almost fourteen years
    I couldn’t believe you kept a smile
    Now I can rest assured knowing that we’ve seen the worst”

    • Kathy says:

      Barbara, I will think of that song Mandolin Wind as the winter continues to pass. This winter does make me think of the pioneers and the winters that they experienced. We have gotten so spoiled. Remember the Little House on the Prairie story where Pa had to tie a rope between the barn and house just to find it during a storm? And how the school children almost lost their way during one of those blizzards? We’re like babies with our experiences compared to that.

      You will be glad to know that my car is now dug out and I made it to town yesterday for a doctor’s appointment. Stocked up on food! We have a lot in our freezers, but it’s the fresh fruits and veggies which need constant re-stocking.

      So nice to hear from you!

  11. Lori says:

    Well, this is a good news, bad news sort of thing. At least you have Italy to look forward to.

    I know what you mean about the tired old body trying to do things that used to be so simple. Since we moved back to Chicago, we couldn’t figure out why winter seems more difficult than it used to when we lived here 27 years ago. Of course, we didn’t want to admit it was age, but eventually, we had to come to grips. 😉 I know it’s worse by you, but it really is a rough one this year. We’ve had above average snow and below normal temps.

    Onto comment about Italy. What made your daughter choose Positano? Had she been there before? Will it be a small or big wedding? Italy weddings are so beautiful. I wish I wasn’t afraid to fly (claustrophobia). I was in Italy when I was young (and still afraid, but not as much as now). I loved it and wanted to honeymoon at the Island of Capri, but we didn’t make it there. Hawaii was a good second choice.

    Very excited for you about your daughter’s wedding in Italy. 🙂

    • Kathy says:

      It’s a sad day when we have to come to grips, lol. OK, the reason they decided on Positano. They had both been to southern Italy before and really liked it. However, they wanted a destination wedding to someplace they hadn’t visited before. Her best friend, Amber, had been to Positano and said it was the most amazing place. So that’s how they picked it! P.S. We are taking a boat trip to the Island of Capri one of the days during the wedding! So sorry that you’re afraid to fly…I can see how that might happen. I used to be a bit afraid to fly, but nowadays don’t even feel scared any more. It kind of wore itself out. I used to touch the airplane when entering and say a prayer/blessing. Thanks for reading AND thanks for your excitement!

      • Lori says:

        OMG, I’m so glad you’re going to the Island of Capri. I can’t wait to hear what you think. I haven’t been a lot of places in the world, but of the places I’ve been, that’s my very favorite (better than Hawaii). I hope that you get to go into the grotto at Capri. The story of my trip to Italy is in my short story memoir and I describe the Island in detail. It’s only .99 cents on Kindle if you’re interested. Thanks for explaining. Positano looks magical.

  12. Barb says:

    Of course I’ve heard that song, but I’m amazed that Barry has the words memorized. We’re also shoveling, plowing, and raking the roof. By “we” I mean Bob. It’s all caught up but more in the forecast. It will surely snow in Breckenridge through May (but we’ll be leaving for the beach in late April). Yesterday and today we have temps into the low 40’s which is a nice change from single digits and bitter windchills. I guess you’ll soon be shopping for a Mother of the Bride dress (if you can get out of the driveway). My grandsons would love to climb on your wood shed roof and jump into that piled snow.

    • Kathy says:

      Barb, he actually didn’t have all the words memorized–only the main stanza. We had to look up the rest of the lyrics. By the way, I feel your snow pain. So much work! Love it when the temperatures start rising. We’ve only reached the 30’s, but that feels heavenly. Yes, the Mother of the Bride dress is on my list for this spring when the snow goes down a little!

  13. Reggie says:

    I’ve also never heard of that song before, Kathy, but it sounds like you needed a good (even if slightly hysterical) laugh, with all that snow! I’m not surprised you’ve got a bit of cabin fever.

    Sending you rays of sunlight to melt all that snow away quick-quick, so that you can head off to your nearest town and catch up with your friends there, and do some shopping, and whatever you need to do after this period of enforced solitude.

    • Kathy says:

      Thank you so much for your kind snow-melting wishes, Reggie! We have only had about three more inches since the last storm, so there’s hope that things are calming down. Have been off to town twice since the blizzard. The first day it was really hard to see around the snowbanks. It looked like half the county was out trying to get caught up on shopping!

  14. john k. says:

    Well, I guess your snowmobile suit picture answers my question on facebook if that was your Grandmother’s. Too bad we Mr. Trump can’t build his wall out of snow. It is successfully keeping you in and successfully keeping me out of our respective dwellings. 😉

    • Kathy says:

      John, you are so right–it WAS Grandma’s snowmobile suit! Last winter it was getting so hard to pull on and I ripped it (and sewed it) twice. However, with all the weight I lost in the past year it now goes on like a breeze! Second however–the suit is 50 years old. How long do you think it will continue to last?

  15. Ohhhhhhhhhh, Kathy. You are a wonder and a saint. A football player (well, those goal posts, right?) and a beer drinker. A survivor (you haven’t quite gone bat-shit cabin fever crazy…yet) and a tremendous blogger. I feel like I’m in your home, watching the snow fly, drinking an IPA (yup, I love a good sturdy beer, none of those weak ‘light’ things) giggling over nothing which is everything.
    You are a sweetie – and I love that photo of you. The bears dancing? As real as my heart singing right now. (PS. That song is my new ‘best song ever’ – never heard it before….) 🙂

    • Kathy says:

      Ha, you never fail to crack me up. A wonder AND a saint! And all those other things, too. Except, i must come clean. I do not drink beer, except for ocassional sips. Barry is the IPA drinker. He makes me taste ’em when we go out to restaurants. “Come on, Kathy,” he says, “just a little sip!” And then I must give my best beer analysis. I am actually more of a wine drinker and was talked into (ahem, very easily) going to a local wine tasting on Wednesday eve. Something to do in all this snow, you know! P.S. Drop on by with your enthusiasm any time. YOU are a wonder and a saint. 🙂

      • I only acquired a taste for beer in the past five years or so. Don’t know why, but my son-in-law is open-mouthed because I enjoy the more ‘hearty’ IPA’s like he does (and actually he has a bit of a ‘weak’ taste for beer, in my mind). But yes, wine is my liquid of choice most nights. When I’m “talked into it.” Haha. If it makes you feel any better, I’m sitting here typing as the snow falls upon house and wooded dale, 10 inches so far. It’s lovely, but not as lovely as Kauai was two weeks ago. ;-0

  16. PPS. HOW EXCITING about Italy and “THE WEDDING”!!!!

  17. sherrysescape says:

    Oh, yes – I’ve heard of that song 🙂 If you feel like blazing a trail snowshoeing on the Bay, let me know – I’m up for it!

    • Kathy says:

      Sherry, why am I not surprised? You are a snowshoe trail-blazer extraordinaire! I will let you know if and when the urge to trail blaze strikes. 🙂

  18. Joanne says:

    I do hope yous are all doing fine under those big piles of shoveled snow, Kathy (and here I was thinking that was an Australian vernacular!)

    And a wedding in Italy – how exciting! My son is getting married at the end of March, and my daughter at the end of April, but both are having local weddings.

    There’ll be no snow in Italy in June! My daughter was there June last year, during a heat-wave. 🙂

    • Kathy says:

      Joanne, how fun that we both have weddings this year. Doesn’t matter if they’re local, they’re still always such fun. We actually have another wedding this year, too. My brother and his fiance are “tying the knot” downstate in August at their cottage. Can’t wait for that one too!

  19. Lisa Woolery says:

    My husband just went out for milk as we brace for seven inches tonight in Kansas City! Oh gosh, not another snow day on Monday please! We need a heartier school bus.

    • Kathy says:

      Lisa, wondering if you got those seven inches last night. Did you get a snow day? Michigan kids have missed so many days of school this year it’s crazy. I think it’s maybe nine days.

      • Lisa Woolery says:

        I think more like three. And we’ve had 7 snow or “winter weather” days this year. I’m expecting school to be cancelled because it will be zero during bus time, that’s what they did last time. School now has 5 extra minutes. I do love this winter though I’m not getting much mommy peace during the day!

Thank you for reading. May you be blessed in your life...may you find joy in the simple things...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s